It is entirely possible that one person may describe an individual as difficult and another may see it completely differently. Equally, individuals may behave differently towards different people, consequently it is important to understand that so-called difficult people may not be difficult at all. What is required when dealing with difficult people is to adapt to individual behaviour.
Difficult People or Difficult Behaviour
Managing difficult people or people with difficult behaviour requires finding an appropriate way to communicate so that performance objectives are clear. Difficult behaviours include:
- Insensitive or excessive task focus
- Very detail oriented
- Excessively negative
- Indecisive
- Temper tantrums
Excessive Task Focus
People with an excessive task focus will appear to be insensitive to others as they focus on what needs to be done and what they are doing with little or no consideration of their impact on other people. These people may show a lack of empathy with others or awareness of their needs. Behaviour may also include lack of embarrassment or avoiding daily pleasantries or non-work related conversation.
When dealing with this behaviour be clear, specific and direct.
Very Detailed Oriented
Very detailed oriented people may not perform tasks or have only completed part of it because they have not understood intent. They focus on very specific details and may arrive at an unexpected conclusion. Their planning may be very detailed about particular tasks but not extend to the overall objective. They will tend to give long and very detailed answers. They may complete processes assigned in a step-wise manner but not demonstrate any initiative.
When dealing with this behaviour, be detailed in delegation of tasks, set deadlines and summarise agreements and actions in writing. Help them to see the objectives of tasks or to see the bigger picture.
Excessively Negative
Everything is seen in negative terms with problems everywhere and with everything. They focus on what they don't have.
When dealing with this behaviour, focus on the task and engaging them in the solution to achieve objectives and avoid problems. More counter-intuitively in some circumstances, the desired behaviour may be obtained by being more negative than they are.
Indecisive
Delaying or no decisions or frequently changing their mind.
When dealing with this behaviour, help them to establish the possible options and then criteria for a decision, then use that to make a decision by a specified date or time. In short, establish a decision-making process.
Temper Tantrums and General Inappropriate Behaviour
People start to shout or become very animated or insulting may have a strong focus on their own needs or negative assumptions about others, including inappropriately telling others what to do. Opinions are given as facts.
When dealing with this be calm, defuse any current situation and focus on explaining appropriate behaviour in a private.
Managing Performance
Managing performance with difficult people may be a matter of changing perspective or having a difficult conversation. Alternatively, it may simply be a different approach to communicating with an individual. Every situation will be different and if in doubt seek advice or help.
Roger Lever - Early career was in Treasury Banking and this led to my interest in financial investment, especially the stockmarket. Enjoy reading widely ...
